I don’t believe in hate.
Everyone has a good side.
When someone is hated, he was seen most for his flaws and less for his goods.
Loving everyone. Someday, that should be a rule.
This couple of days, I’ve been finding excuses to drag my bike out for a ride. It keeps me sane. The drones of the cars pleased my ears for they seem to prevent others from reaching that voice inside my head. Anger, frustration… that angel and devil commonly featured spinning around the protagonist of stories, I regret to say, do exist in real people. The devil encourages my anger and displeasure, my sadness, tears… while the angel encourages me to run away from reality, to create a soul that’s not my own. Put the two of them together, and a full blown war implodes in every fibre of me. It hurts all the time. The strikes happen at wrong times. Untimely. Like in most wars, its hard to tell who’s really right and who’s at fault. I would love a forward button that can let me skip all of the pain and unhappiness, and bounce me straight onto a happy life I hope I’ll eventually get. If its death, let it come quickly. If it isn’t, God, if all of these are the reasons I’m alive, please concentrate it, cram it into one intense short time period so that I can be happy again. You’ve never let me feel true happiness, smile a real smile, laugh a genuine laugh, feel real closure and really enjoy life for 6 years. I can’t remember how those feel. Please help me experience them again. Nobody, not even Hitler (I presume he’s evil), deserves do go through what I have and am going through. Its not fair to me. You of all people/beings should know that. This is me, saying ‘stop’. Right now. I honestly can’t take it anymore. You’re not helping.
Pray for me, friends. I’ll continue believing in Jesus. Its my only way out.
And thanks for the emails. I got some pretty hilarious ones. They made my day.
For those expecting something sweet…
It is an entremet with banana mousse, vanilla chantilly whipped cream and chocolate tofu cream sandwiched between springy almond sponge. The banana layer almost gave me a heart attack (though unlikely). I used some really ripe, soggy, close to rotting bananas that were just barely swimming in their own juice. I added lemon juice, blended the damn thing and went out to get something unique for about 3 hours, and when I came back, the mixture was stinky. It smelt like something had died in the blender and the bananas were cocoa brown. I freaked out in a small part of my brain, kept my composure, and tasted it. You can imagine how relieved I was when it tasted absolutely normal and even kinda delicious. After the cooking, the banana layer was fine and terrific.
The sponge. Best I’ve ever had. Moist, soft, easy, almond-y, has a nutty texture (because of the almonds, yet not so tense that it overpowers the sponge), no eggy at all. A dream! Definitely a to-go sponge cake.
And speaking of sponge cakes, I’ve recently got a hang on the whole beating egg whites till shaving cream business (stiff peaks of egg meringue). Now its easy! I used to not like it because it made me waste eggs. If you’ve had and are still having trouble, here’s my suggestion to you; the method I figured out after wasting CARTONS of eggs. Listen up.